Has your child ever been in this scenario:
Taking forever to wake up, brush teeth, and use the bathroom, lost in slow motion;
And when it comes to helping your child with homework, the most annoying thing is their procrastination.
Some children not only procrastinate with homework but are slow with everything. They need to be rushed to wake up, brush their teeth, wash their face, eat, and even getting out the door in the morning takes dozens of reminders…

Parents find themselves helpless against their child’s procrastination and resort to constant nagging, only to discover that the more they urge, the slower the child becomes!

In reality, rushing not only fails to speed up the child but also causes significant harm to their brain.

First, we need to understand the reasons behind the child’s procrastination deeply.

Children’s procrastination doesn’t happen without reason; it often hides deeper issues.

For example, a child might procrastinate because they find a task difficult, fear failure, or feel pressured by parental expectations.

As parents, we need to patiently communicate with our children to understand their true thoughts and feelings and find the root cause of the problem.

Additionally, rushing can harm a child’s intellectual development.
Before the age of 12 is a crucial period for brain development, with many neurons forming connections and countless pieces of information entering the brain through the senses daily.

When a child is thinking or doing something, if the parent urges them, the neuronal connections in the brain get interrupted.

Over time, the brain’s development narrows, leading to intellectual differences.

Moreover, when parents rush their children, they often raise their voices or even do so emotionally.

If a child is constantly yelled at and urged, it will also affect their brain development.

Researchers at Harvard Medical School have conducted a study spanning over a decade on the “long-term damage of verbal abuse from parents.”
The findings revealed that constant urging and yelling kill hippocampal cells, disrupt the development of the prefrontal cortex, and ultimately reduce the child’s memory and learning abilities.

So how can we properly guide our children to avoid procrastination?
Here are three points on the correct way to guide children away from procrastination:

Enhance the child’s sense of self-efficacy

Self-efficacy is basically the feeling of “I am good, and I can do it.”

If your child is still in lower primary school, you can accompany them while they study and supervise them.

But supervision doesn’t mean constant correction. If the child is a bit slow, writes sloppily, or worse, confuses addition with subtraction, don’t always correct them.

Don’t rush them, and don’t say things like, “Why are you so slow? Look at the time! Other kids are already done!”

If the child has difficulties, we need to provide timely help.
When the child makes progress, such as finishing homework in 1 hour instead of the usual 2 hours, we should encourage them promptly.

Even though it’s still slow, timely encouragement helps improve the child’s sense of self-efficacy.

When the child has a positive evaluation of themselves, they will naturally become more proactive and reduce procrastination gradually.

Parents should be patient

Procrastination isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Many historical figures were procrastinators.

For example, the painter Leonardo da Vinci worked on the “Mona Lisa” intermittently for 16 years.

So procrastination doesn’t necessarily correlate with poor performance.
For instance, some high-achieving students also play games during their study breaks.

Unlike those with phone addiction, they set specific times for gaming, and when the time is up, they stop playing.

This degree of procrastination can actually be a way for the brain to relax.

Let the child bear the consequences of procrastination

In family education, there’s a rule: the more parents do, the less the child will.

If parents put 80% effort into completing a task, the child will only put in 20%.

If you continue to increase your effort, the child might do nothing at all.
For instance, some high-achieving students also play games during their study breaks.

Unlike those with phone addiction, they set specific times for gaming, and when the time is up, they stop playing.

This degree of procrastination can actually be a way for the brain to relax.

The more parents worry and rush, the less urgent the child becomes.

For example: After the child finishes their homework in the evening, we only need to remind them to pack their homework.

If the child can’t find their homework in the morning, don’t step in – let them find it themselves.

By letting the child bear the consequences of procrastination, they will learn to prepare in advance and reduce procrastination.

Only this way can a child gradually overcome the habit of procrastination and become self-disciplined, confident, and responsible.